In the ceremony itself, the roles of the Presenters (who may be designated as “Best Men” or “Maids/Matrons of Honor” are small. Presenters normally carry and present the rings, tend to a bride’s train, and hold her flowers as necessary. But the work that earns them the title “Best Men” or “Maids/Matrons of Honor” comes immediately before and after the ceremony, and should be taken seriously. They are the Chief Attendants of the couple, and should be selected carefully not only on the basis of existing friendships, but of their capacity to exercise their responsibilities reliably.
On the day of the ceremony, any logistical responsibilities not already delegated to others should fall to the chief attendants, and not to the couple. Presenters are responsible for assembling the other attendants and communicating between the wedding party, Officiant, and Wedding Coordinator. Last minute questions from photographers, florists, caterers, and others should be handled by the Presenters, and not by the couple. Couples should not be on cell phones trying to locate guests who’ve lost their way or florists who’ve failed to deliver decorations. They don’t need to concern themselves with paying vendors, keeping track of marriage licenses, or coaching shy ring bearers. If the couple are in possession of a cell phone, a pen, or a checklist on the day of the ceremony, it means that one of the Presenter’s is neglecting his or her responsibility.
Both at the rehearsal and at the ceremony, the Presenters are responsible for gathering the other attendants and communicating between them and the Officiant. When an attendant wanders away shortly before the ceremony begins, it’s a Presenter’s responsibility to locate him or her, not the couple’s, and not the Officiant’s. When an attendant’s flowers aren’t right, it’s a Presenter’s job to speak to the florist, not the couple’s.
The Presenters’ attention to these responsibilities will help ensure a relaxed and joyful ceremony.Last updated: July 22, 2015 at 14:52 pm