Nurse's Notes

2003

WHERE HAS SHE GONE?

My best friend’s Mom is 95 this year, in amazingly good health, spry, blood pressure and heart normal, vision clear, hearing intact. The only problem is that Gwennie has no idea who she is or where she is, nor does she recognize any of her three children or her six grandchildren, let alone the rest of us who have known her for more than 40 years.

This thing we call “dementia” is a horrible affliction, robbing folks we love of their very personalities—the “person” we knew and loved is gone. Alzheimer’s Disease and other dementias have been described as killing people twice—first we lose our loved one to some other dimension, and then finally, and blessedly, we lose their bodies. They “die” twice and we mourn them twice.

The aging of our society has brought about a surge in old age dementias—like other forms of disease that primarily affect the elderly, dementias were not so common when life expectancy was in the 40’s or 50’s. Now it is the rare family that has not experienced someone near and dear with the problem. According to those who know, as many as 10 million Americans will experience some form of dementia by 2050—a staggering number, given that there is no cure and at this time, no substantial treatment. The financial and social costs are extreme and stretch the capabilities of an already overburdened health system.

Dementia is a general term that refers to a condition where there is memory impairment and at least one of the following problems: aphasia (speech impairment—sometimes just the inability to get out the right word), apraxia (coordination problems), and agnosia (which is a problem with sensory input or disturbances in functioning, such as the use of judgment or problem solving). These deficits are progressive and show a decline from a previously higher level of functioning.

Memory impairment is one of the earliest signs of developing dementia and is of great concern to those of us who experience “senior moments”. Older people often worry about not remembering names or misplacing items such as car keys. The difference between normal age-related memory impairment and early dementia is the degree of memory loss. Forgetting where you put your keys is not the problem; forgetting what the keys are for is.

Alzheimer’s is the most common type of dementia and affects about 3 percent of the population older than 65. Vascular dementia (caused by stroke) and Alzheimer’s both increase in occurrence with age, so that about 1 in every 5 people older than 85 (20 percent) experience some symptoms. Dementias also occur in varying percentages with other problems, such as in some Parkinson’s patients, Korsakov’s dementia (associated with alcohol abuse), head trauma, “mad cow” disease, and other such diagnoses.

As with any disease process, the goal is to maintain as much quality of life as possible and to provide as much comfort as possible. Right now the emphasis is on early diagnosis because there are some newer drugs that seem to slow down the progression of the more common dementias in the early stages. They also seem to help regulate moods and enhance attention and concentration.

Families are often in great distress when dementia strikes a loved one. Do they take care of him at home? “We always promised Dad we’d never put him in a nursing home!” is a phrase I hear over and over. All family dynamics are unique, but it should be pointed out that no one person can give 24/7 care, and reasonably none of us should expect such sacrifice from our families.

It falls to us at St. Margaret’s to extend our love and support to families making crucial decisions about the care of loved ones, and also to recognize when there may be a problem developing in one of our parishioners. Help is available in many forms, not the least of which is prayer.

Gwennie, and her family, are in my prayers daily. And Gwennie, although she doesn’t know it, is safely cared for in a special Alzheimer’s facility where we can visit as often as we want, whether she knows us or not. The Gwennie we knew is gone, but we loved her then and we love her now. No one can ask for more.
 


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